Tuesday, 1 May 2007

short novel

Dear Editor of Penguin Books,

Please find below my short novel 'The Man in the Road' for your consideration. Seeing as the novel is only eight words long, I thought it might be okay to just copy and paste it below. However, if you would prefer to receive the manuscript separately - double spaced, with title page and word count, etc. - then i will be more than happy to oblige.

I wish you all the best with your future publications and wait hopefully for your reply,

Chris Killen

The Man in the Road

We were watching the man in the road.


Socrates said...

Hi Chris,
This is Armaundo Brighouse, Captain of Penguin Books. I have read your manuscript five times and it has made such a huge impression on me that I am in the process of writing a letter about it. I would love to publish it. Please find enclosed a cheque for five million pounds.
Best Wishes,
Your Friend,

oscar macsweeny said...

you jammy bastard... i've written loads of things better than this. i'll never read another penguin again. they're such cunts

Ben Myers said...

Dear Chris Killen,

I have recently read your novel 'The Man In The Road' and was alarmed to see that it bears more than a passing similarity to my acclaimed novel 'The Boy In The Road' whose main plot is: "We were watching the boy in the road" (the sub-plot, I'm pleased to report, is so deeply embedded it has not yet been discovered by scholar or reader alike.)

As such I have instructed my lawyer to take legal action upon grounds of plagiarism.

I will be seeking damages up to and including five million pounds. Maybe more.

See you in Strasbourg.

Ben Myers

Frank Morgan said...

Myers Vs Killen

May I refer you to a quote from my lawyer (who asked me to pass on the message that he is available should you require representation):

'What is this Myers character on about? To imply that there are even vague similarities between the novels is mere conjecture, this will be laughed out of court, mark my words'

mark said...

check out the review here.

Aiden Clarkson said...

this novel has too much bleak sex in it.