Maybe today will be the day I talk to Carmella.
I contrive situations in my head where I talk to Carmella.
I say interesting, soundless things to her.
Carmella laughs interestingly and soundlessly back at them.
At one point in my head I make Carmella cry.
At another point I make her fall in love with me.
We go on a cruise ship together.
We become shipwrecked on an island.
I hold her to me.
She smells of saltwater.
I will not talk to Carmella today.